That Floating Poo Was Way Too Symbolic! These Are the TV Letdowns of the Past Year.

Looking back, we reflect on the television offerings of the recent year, a handful of series stand out not for their excellence, but for their spectacular failures. From cringe-inducing spin-offs to bafflingly bad documentaries, here are the productions that had us utterly bewildered or just reaching for the remote.

The 'Sex and the City' Sequel

How to start with this divisive spin-off? Burdened with dreadful scripts, painful arcs (justice for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the show fought to find its footing. Briefly, as the final series began, it looked like it had finally found its groove. Then came an installment centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the showrunner announced this would be the final series. It ended on a bum note; the closeup of Miranda’s loo flooded with poo was just way too symbolic. Yet, viewers certainly had a hoot picking apart every single “wtf?” episode. And as Carrie – once again single – twirled around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t release a small sob?

The Kim Kardashian Drama

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? The answer is a resounding no.’

But that was almost the smallest of this drama's problems. The recipient of a very rare zero star assessment, it was hard to know where to begin listing the flaws. The laughably leaden writing? The tedious glorification of affluence and consumption? The almost wilful procession of tropes? Performances so bad they felt almost malicious? Let’s just say “each and every one” and forget about this series again. Except, a new season has been ordered, so we’re likely going to have to.

AKA Charlie Sheen

Considering the restraining orders, abuse claims and fatherly shortcomings, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not you’d really have known it from this three-part documentary which chuckled along at Sheen’s various bouts of self-destructive hedonism while failing to tell us a single thing we weren't already aware of. Rather, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any sympathy this series might induce should be reserved for the people who have had to suffer proximity with this charming but dismissive narcissist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Of course we knew it was preposterous from the outset: a drama about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or destroy all of humanity. We persevered out of pure admiration for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One scarcely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately hacking Charlie with an axe … in super slow-motion. That's what you call admitting defeat.

The Gangster Drama

Dodgy characters meeting in deserted boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back.

In truth, that is harsh on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many seem a little old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t endure the embarrassment of having to indulge unconvincing accents. But there were plenty of other issues. Mainly that it was just really boring; a conflict over narcotics territory between various London rogues which felt a bit basic.

The Meghan Markle Series

Considering the extent to which she grinds the gears of the nation’s ostentatiously angry commentators, it’s almost easy to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s various ventures into twee homemaking as deliberate statements. But then you watch them and are forced to concede that actually, they may have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle catalogue animated; a poster for wine o’clock with ideas of grandeur; a parade of sleeping dogs, buzzing beehives, sentimental platitudes and pointless crafting “tips” you’ll not remember instantly. All supported by vast, mostly unearned wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are clearly interesting things to be said about regarding Victoria Beckham and her journey with vocation, identity, self-worth. But for whatever reason, this documentary series opted not to say them. Rather, the viewing was like reading a marketing catalogue. She clearly has every right to bridle at what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But unfortunately, she failed to do herself any helps with this guarded non-event of a series.

The Game Show

It should have been the next big hit – except even more extravagant, with a famous star playing dead and a well-known personality overseeing her inheritance. What more could you ask for? As players competed, there was plenty of betrayal and arguing. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s even now too complicated to detail what precisely was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw glimpses of the star via prerecorded videos. The show ended up reeking of a programme that was straining desperately to emulate something way beyond it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How do you succeed a show that defined a generation? The pressure was immense for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who arrives in London with a shattered romance. The star seized the opportunity by the horns and was a delight to watch, embodying Jane Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very glossy and, ironically, was insufficient. Plus, the abundance of famous friends involved felt uncomfortable.

Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping

Not good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the shrewd recruitment of talented emerging comics, expectations were high. But sadly, most of it didn’t land. A recurring sketch was a one-note joke stretched to a dry pulp but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a well-known ranting mode. The writing room sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the idea that they should probably have remained in there a while longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was overseen by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively presented the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there undoubtedly is an compelling drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The subject matter needed to be handled sensitively. Instead, the series struggled painfully to find the right tone, lurching from oddly breezy, slightly stylised farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Complex? Perhaps. A complete mess? Very much so.

Prime Target

We love the star … but did we buy him playing the most brilliant maths genius in history, a man so intelligent he’s on the brink of a discovery that could destabilise society? No! This globe-trotting thriller about secret services targeting – and eliminating – academics honestly got more absurd by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.

The Bonnie Blue Documentary

This hagiography followed the online personality renowned for sexual escapades as she prepared for her biggest challenge yet. What on earth would possess her? What we craved was way more examination of her true psychology, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have interviewed the legendary mum who appeared to haul her son out of the queue. What we got was disturbing shots and zero interrogation of her infamy whatsoever. And to think, the documentary-maker has a young daughter too.